special
The Gilded Curse
Cristina Cabrera
For Sale: Antique Mechanical Bird Cage
Wind-up singing bird in a gilded cage. Fully functional. Excellent condition, not cursed.
Provenance:
- Ida Strauss - Perished on the Titanic. Cage found floating on debris, bird singing.
- Julia Florence Cavendish - Purchased at auction, died in train crash still holding the cage.
- Ellen Mary Barber - Cavendish’s nanny, gifted the cage. Perished in house fire.
- Anna Parvati - Purchased from Barber’s husband. Died in bus accident. Cage found near the bus.
- Paulina Teodora - Inherited from Aunt Anna. Murdered in her home by her husband. Cage found beside body, bird still singing.
Must sell before it’s too late.
Cristina Cabrera
Warning: There Are No Paintings in the Museum
Elle Burnett
Lucas Sampson
The Oeil
2125.001.1a-z
Glass & metal
On loan from the Center for Correct Thought
The American Museum of Art and Design is proud to debut our only exhibit. The Oeil is a 10-foot-tall monolith dedicated to restoring sanity to our museum sector.
The Oeil uses revolutionary facial diagnostic technology to read the expression of the viewer, and run it against their algorithm recommendations from the past 30 days. The Oeil tracks changes in facial expressions, and adjusts accordingly. With these revolutionary changes, you never need to feel a moment of boredom again.
For example, if you feel joy, the Oeil will take inspiration from a cherished memory, and allow you to immerse yourself in the experience. If you feel sad, the Oeil will generate content based on your personalized serotonin algorithm. If you feel inquisitive, the Oeil will pull from the list of approved art and literature, and place your favorite characters in new and exciting situations. Think about the Mona Lisa with a fantastic new smile!
If you feel discontent, we have already notified the proper authorities.
Lucas Sampson believes that good art lies in the perspective of the morally just, and seeks to share these corrected thoughts with all eligible visitors. On behalf of all members of the American Museum of Art, we are proud to debut the last, and only, piece of art you will ever need to see.
So, look up, and enjoy the best we have to offer.
Elle Burnett is a writer and historian, interested in the intersections between place, social memory, and the layers of asbestos between them.
Pearled.
NICHOLAS DE MARINO
i.
Melted.
Erupted.
Crystallized.
ii.
Gnawed.
Drowned.
Entombed.
iii.
Abducted.
Desecrated.
Trafficked.
iv.
Fetishized
Strangulated.
Anathematized.
Nicholas De Marino is a neurodivergent rhyparographer. More at foofaraw and nicholasdemarino.blogspot.com.
FC Life Forever!
ANDREW E. LOVE, JR.
March 4, 2025, 8:31 AM
Hi! Welcome to Maddie and Mark’s Flying-Carpet-Life! We took the plunge and are now living on our flying carpet full-time just exploring the world. We’ll be updating the blog regularly, so check in every day. Be seeing you –- from above!
March 5, 2025, 10:34 AM
Quick tour of our setup: We’ve got a classic flying carpet. I found it in my great-grandmother’s attic (Don’t know where she got it, but great-grandpa served with Patton in North Africa.) We keep supplies in backpacks hanging from ropes across the width of the carpet (Remember, balance your supplies every time you take off, so you fly level!). The popup tent is rolled up in the front and the chemical toilet in the back – we try not to have to use that last one, but “be prepared.”
March 5, 2025, 1:17 PM
The sky is beautiful now, with fluffy clouds all around us. We ate a great lunch at a little diner tucked away off old Rt. 66.
Explore old highways – it’s not like the potholes can stop you!
March 7, 2025, 2:05 PM
Shoutout to my fellow carpet-lifers! Anybody out there know anything about carpet care? We’ve got some fraying at the edges. Gives us another reason to cuddle close, though!
March 10, 2025, 9:10 AM
Some weird smoke is coming from the carpet, making strange shapes, and we keep getting higher. Any advice? I’m down to one bar on the pho—
Andrew E. Love, Jr., engineer and fan, has been published at James Gunn’s Ad Astra and Reactormag.com.
Travel Journal Entry #3
E.J. LEROY
A plastic bottle
Remnant of humanity
Universal thread
Odd thoughts while writing this travel journal entry. Faces and feet pass in a blur in front of arches and mosaics. Everyone talks about the architecture or cuisine while traveling, maybe the language and national dress. But there’s a plastic bottle in the road, a universal sign of both littering and global capitalism. In a flash, I see the commonality of all mankind, not through family, friendship, or love, but litter. The familiar packaging, the international brand name—how can anyone fight when we share the same water and imbibe from the same companies?
E.J. LeRoy is a Pushcart Prize-nominated writer with a forthcoming mpreg novella. Curious? Visit http://ejleroy.weebly.com.
Regrets
LINDAANN LOSCHIAVO
Native New Yorker. Poet. Writer. Dramatist.
LindaAnn LoSchiavo’s poetry books have won multiple awards.
Bad as Heck
NICHOLAS DE MARINO
Nicholas De Marino is a neurodivergent rhyparographer. More at nicholasdemarino.blogspot.com.
Tax write-offs for a goblin bounty hunter
EMMIE CHRISTIE
Date: 3/Dying Dusk/10,490
Amount Billed: 130 hexes
Description: Trench coat with flame decals
Category: Intimidation
Date: 18/Dying Dusk/10,490
Amount Billed: 16.4 hexes
Description: squeal-meal box
Category: Business lunch
Date: 9/Dead of Midnight/10,490
Amount Billed: 60.9 hexes
Description: Trench coat alterations, shortened hem by 3 feet
Category: Intimidation
Date: 5/Graven Dawn/10,490
Amount Billed: 4.1 hexes
Description: Cream for ego-burn from 8th grade elves
Category: Miscellaneous
Date: 11/Graven Dawn/10,490
Amount Billed: 3.1 hexes
Description: Drought of motivation to care about anything
Category: Business Supplies
Date: 14/Mist and Misery/10,490
Amount Billed: 30.2 hexes
Description: Fake Scythe
Category: Intimidation
Date: 9/Three Suns' Hot/10,490
Amount Billed: 108 hexes
Description: Paralyzing blow darts
Category: Business Supplies
Date: 17/Three Suns' Hot/10,490
Amount Billed: 30 hexes
Description: Full body ego-burn care
Category: Miscellaneous
Date: 17/Three Suns' Hot/10,490
Amount Billed: 208 hexes
Description: Application to leave region
Category: Management fees